I’m seeing a lot of posts at the moment where everyone is talking about how awesome summer is. Now don’t get me wrong, I do love a bit of warm weather, exposing my pasty legs and doing a bit of sun worship (then staying out too long and looking like a little jelly baby), but there are also times when summer can be a right dick and here are my ten reasons why.
1. All the magazine articles that tell you how to get your body “bikini ready”. Oh fuck off, and when you get there, fuck off some more. Anyone can wear a bikini; you don’t need to have tan or shave your legs so much that you take off the top layer of skin and you most certainly don’t need to “banish that muffin top” or do “50 squats a day for that perfect beach bum!”. Just no.
2. Applying sunscreen may be necessary but Jesus, does it have to be so blimmin’ gloopy? You also never know if you’re applying too little so you go overboard and end up looking like an extra from The Addams Family. And at the end of a hard day sun-bathing, you find a spot you missed. Neat.
3. We get throngs of tourists in Brighton over the summer and while I like the fact they’re ploughing money into our local economy, I don’t like that they walk more slowly than a snail, seven abreast on the pavement and then stop dead in the road, point to a dot, like, 500 miles away and proclaim “look Ethel, it’s Brighton Pier!” Yes love, we all know it’s there but do keep moving, some of us have places to be you know!
4. When you’ve decided you’re having a healthy dinner of Mediterranean stuffed peppers and the smell of someone’s BBQ wafts over your house. It’s just not necessary. Unless you’re going to invite me over, in which case your BBQ rocks!
5. Hay fever. The tiniest bit of nice weather and there go my eyes, streaming and wasting those precious minutes in the morning I spent carefully applying eyeliner when I could have slept some more. Or catching up on Instagram! Cheers body, you’re the best. Coupled with an itchy throat and a sneezy nose, summer really makes me hate nature. Stupid trees, grass and flowers.
6. You’re out enjoying the lovely sunny weather, then suddenly it’s pouring down with rain and you’re holed up with 20 other people taking shelter in a doorway that smells vaguely like someone did a wee. Which they probably did. And you didn’t think to bring an umbrella or poncho because the man on TV and your smart phone app said it would be nice all day! You now have to trudge home looking like a drowned rat.
7. Now I’m an adult I have to go to work, which means I no longer get 6 weeks off to do sod all and complain about being bored. Booo!
8. Wasps. Those little bastards turn up all unannounced to the party and gatecrash while everyone panics and starts throwing food everywhere hoping to entice the wasps elsewhere. Which never works. They don’t like wasabi peas. Apparently.
9. Seagulls. Pretty similar to number 8 but seagulls are a bit more vicious, they’ll take the chips clean out of your hands. Then sit near you and gloat.
10. Once the summer hits, it means it’ll soon be autumn and then winter, which means more rainy, windy, miserable weather 🙁
What do you hate about summer? Let me know in the comments below 🙂 x
I am not a massive fan of wasps either, they scare me 🙂
Nic | Nic’s Adventures & Bakes
I just don’t understand their purpose lol
Oh I love the Summer months and wish we had warmer weather year round, I hate the cold months with a passion. There are some downsides to Summer though like the bugs that seem to think I taste pretty delicious and decide to feast on me in the middle of the night leaving me with large itchy and pox like spots! And people who don’t wash, bathe or shower when its hot – enough said on that one I think!!
I am loving the wrmer weather, but yes the bugs and stuff aren’t fun when you’re enjoying the outdoors; especially with food around, it’s a nightmare!!
That bit about the wasps though *giggle* that is exactly me when I see a wasp. My normal rational self dissapears and I freak out!
I know! It’s like we’re programmed too think that flailing around the place is going to do any good at all 😂
Amazing! I am totally with you on it all. Especially snail people! I am actually doing the #latenightbloggers Twitter chat on something like this this week! I also get such BBQ envy. Except when you’d put washing out and suddenly all your clothes smell of sausage! xx
Ahaha, I bet people will have some interesting views! And when people decide to do up their gardens and have bonfires *grrr* xx
Haha I know! I’m pretty sure I’m just jealous and will be that person one day! But until then…xx
Sweating. I hate sweating in the hot summer months. And chub rub! The only thing I look forward to on hot summer days is a cool shower and my shorty short pj’s! I’m not the biggest fan of Summer, you could say, so I love this post! x http://www.aimeeraindropwrites.co.uk x
Ooooh, I’d forgotten about the sweating, yeah that’s pretty horrific! 😬 Xx
Oh I totally know what you mean about BBQ envy! Last year our neighbours had a hog roast and it smelled divine!! Drooling now just thinking about it 😜 My Mum suffers terribly with hayfever too, I’m lucky and I’ve only ever had it once! I hope you have a lovely summer despite these little niggles!
Abbey ✨ http://www.abbeylouisarose.co.uk
I love a hog roast, my friend had one for her wedding last year! Now I really want one, thanks 😛 You’re so lucky, it’s horrible, my throat is itchy and I’m always tired.
Thank you, you too! I do love summer, I just thought of a few things that puts downers on it 😀 xx
Love this!I always find it hard to know what to wear,the british weather is so unpredictable.I find the heat brings out all the drunks too which i hate.I’m much more of a winter|autumn lover,at least you can layer up if you get cold.x
Ah yeah, I forgot about all the drunks 😬 that’s true, you can’t take off more clothes if you’re only in a bikini or naked! Xx
The only thing I really hate is that it has to end! I want perpetual summer.
Ahaha. Love it!